Welcome today's topic I will discuss
EMOTIONAL ABUSE AND EMOTIONAL HEALTH AND THEIR DIFFERENCES
Emotional Boundaries_client told me that when she was put down and
called names that she said it was helping her in a way because the other
person was being honest with them so therefore they were not invading
any emotional boundary. Her irrational belief was that as long as the
person is honest then they can put me down and emotionally hurt me
because it will help me.
So the question
lies in does being honest have anything to do with respecting the
emotional boundary of someone and is there a written law where it says
that if you are honest you can disrespect, belittle, put down, humiliate
someone. Because after all they are being honest.
Healthy
emotional boundaries is where the other person will take your feelings
under consideration before saying something. AGAIN:Healthy emotional
boundaries is where the other person will take your feelings under
consideration before saying something. Remember: CONSIDER, not do what
you say or change their beliefs or accept. Just consider. Whenever there
is a difference of opinion, yes it is ok to say but say it in a way
that is considerate of other people's feelings. A list of considerate
do's and don't are as follows:
DO examples:
state the facts
state the behaviors how you saw them not heard
state your beliefs
criticize to help
offer help
compliment
Don't examples:
Name call
put down
criticize to hurt
humiliate
embarrass to make fun etc.
For
example: Juanita washes dishes and accidentally breaks a glass. Jose
tells her she is clumsy and always breaks glasses. He continues to tell
her that she can't do anything right and is wasting money by breaking
things etc. Juanita feels it is not emotional abuse since he is being
honest. He is then using the: name call, put down, criticize to hurt,
Example number 2:
For Example: Juanita washes dishes and accidentally breaks a glass. Jose tells her that he has noticed that she has broken several glasses, and then offers his help to come up with different methods such as buying plastic cups or him washing the dishes while she does another chore. He then can continue to find solutions with her reach the goal that they are both content with. He is using:Stating the behaviors on what he is seeing, and offering help and criticizing for help and even offering solutions.
Both methods state the truth however the first one is emotional abuse and the second one is healthy emotional relationships filled with respect. Therefore there will be more improvement with the person with the second option than the first one.
What do you think? Has this ever happened to you? Have you ever thought this? Please comment below and share your thoughts over this matter.
Email: brokenchains@pacc-tx.com or on www.pacc-tx.com as well
Facebook: Positive Awakenings Counseling Center
Twitter: https://twitter.com/pacctx
Broken Chains Blog: http://positiveawakenings.blogspot.com/
What do you think? Has this ever happened to you? Have you ever thought this? Please comment below and share your thoughts over this matter.
If
you have any concerns, questions or would like to comment on any of the blogs or would like for me to discuss a certain
issue, I will be more than happy to discuss it with you. You can email me at
Also for anyone interested in my book "Broken Chains please go to my website or contact me on the info below.
Also for anyone interested in my book "Broken Chains please go to my website or contact me on the info below.
Email: brokenchains@pacc-tx.com or on www.pacc-tx.com as well
Facebook: Positive Awakenings Counseling Center
Twitter: https://twitter.com/pacctx
Broken Chains Blog: http://positiveawakenings.blogspot.com/
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